There is so much controversy among grown folk over the matter of whether to use
corporal punishment to discipline unruly children.
pros and cons of using corporal punishment with children
; and then we’ll focus in on some parenting styles that most people who have children tend to fall into the category of.
• Pro: Spanking, if done right, is effective on a short-term basis for getting children to change their negative behavior.
By done right, I think the agreed concept here is that the method is used when a time out is determined to be an insufficient method for calming the child and drawing their mind away from the unhealthy obsession with misbehaving that they might be manifesting. “If done right” could also mean, in combination with other parenting skills.
• Con: Spanking by itself and without reasoning has proven to increase aggressiveness, antisocial behavior, and can lead to a juvenile criminal record.
This type of spanking, technically, is not what we are viewing even on a corporal level. The category for this type of spanking, though we are not reviewing it in this article, would more appropriately be defined as “abuse”. To spank a child excessively and without understanding provided or clarified, and then to let that child grow sulking in that unfair treatment is a form of abuse.
The next pro and con do not have explanation provided for reasons of time.
• Pro: Spanking, as a complimentary method in conjunction with or as a last resort from reasoning and time-out’s has been found most effective in 2 to 6 year olds.
• Con: Spanking, if society is aware, can welcome unkind reproaches wherein it might be said of your family that your bond with your child is broken because you “have to spank him”.
We will now look into three different parenting styles.
You can call them what you want, but for this article those styles are referred to as Control Freaks, Scared Parents, and Coaching Parents.
A Control Freak will benefit very little from a lesson in parenting skills. A 12 week course of parenting classes would be more appropriate for changing this style. As they are, they don’t provide options and have little patience for their children’s mistakes. Control freaks don’t like to give explanations, and tend to punish their child harshly for asking.
Scared Parents, on the other hand, prefer to give almost all the control to the child. They might make a few rules, but enforcement of those rules are a rare and inconsistent pattern that the child has learned to manipulate. The Scared Parent wouldn’t benefit much from a crash course on parenting skills or a 12 week course of parenting skills classes. Once the parent is scared to discipline their child, the only approach to changing that is going to be for the parent to stop being scared.
Finally the Coaching Parent is the parent who provides clear guidelines and expectations. They are experts at facilitating consistent consequences for inappropriate behavior in a healthy fashion and by utilizing all parenting skills. The Coaching Parent has probably been to a few classes on parenting skills, and continues to remain open to more education on a healthy approach with their dearly loved children.